An Addendum

So July hasn’t really been my month for blogging.  Please accept my most profuse apologies.  But now I have come across something worth writing about and a sliver of time in which to do it.  After spending a weekend cavorting with my good pal Randal in and around San Francisco I felt the need to append a little something to one of my earlier posts.

One of my earliest posts was about how people often think of themselves as different from people in other regions when they aren’t really as different as they claim to be to be – at least not in the way they think.  Well, my good friend Randy, who has also lived in and explored several different regions of this continent, pointed out that I may be overestimating the degree to which our fellow North Americans are the same as one another.  And I agree.  I think my original point still holds, but that I also need to draw attention to the often vast differences among some of these people who each think that they have the most unpredictable weather or the worst drivers in this hemisphere.  We talked about the South and its unique culture.  We talked about Florida and how while it is in the south, it is not the South.  And about how Texas is not quite the South.  We talked about Northern California versus Southern California.  And about other places and cities.  And I think the conclusion to be reached from considering these sort of cultural and regional differences is that… people are different and the same! (dum dum dum!)  I think this may be Nobel Prize material.  

But seriously, while this seems very common sense, some people (like myself) get irritated when people fail to recognize what they share in common with others and other people get offended when people fail to recognize the ways in which they are different from others.  So some people experience false uniqueness and some people experience false consensus and other people react to it.  I suppose the point I want to make (although at this point it may be only loosely connected to what I’ve written here) is that it’s important to see both sides of the coin, so to speak.  With respect to cultural and conspecific similarities and differences we must be able to see and understand them both in order to achieve an harmonious society.  I feel that the inability to do so contributes to much prejudice and bigotry and to much inadvertent and avoidable discrimination.  And on the other hand, an ability to see and appreciate our true differences and similarities will create more patient, happier people.  I encourage everyone to explore the world we live in and experience the things that are different from you and the things that are the same as you.

I am fairly certain that I haven’t said anything that hasn’t been said before a million times, I simply feel that it is important for me to demonstrate that I am at least trying to see both sides of the proverbial coin, especially concerning issues as important to me as the unity of the human race.

On a lighter note, over the weekend I was also reminded of something that many people worldwide have in common: tourist traps.  At the Fisherman’s Wharf area in San Francisco the visitor is treated to a variety of shops and restaurants and quaint performers, the same shops and restaurants and performers that I have encountered at nearly every tourist destination I’ve been to in North America.  There’s almost always some dude playing the pan flute and somebody hawking little beaded or braided “authentic” trinkets from some remote mountain village.  The only difference is the name of the city stitched into the indigenous jewelry.  You probably know what I’m talking about.  I think it’s funny.

What’s Wrong With Going Out Alone?

Who of you has ever gone to a movie or gone out to dinner and spotted someone who has come by themselves?  Now, who of you has ever felt embarrassed or sorry for that person, even if only secretly?  I certainly have.  One instance comes readily to mind for me; it was a poor young fellow in Red Robin who accompanied his burger with a comic book, which he read silently to himself as he ate.  Following his meal, he chose to spend some quality time in the arcade, again by himself.  And I felt a little sorry for him.  At the time I wondered to myself, why would he choose to come alone?  Looking back now, I see that a judgment like that was based on very foolish assumptions.  That is, that he would have preferred to come to dinner with friends that night, which is tied to the assumption that he probably doesn’t have many friends, since he did, in fact, come alone that night.  But that’s ridiculous!  If he enjoys eating Red Robin burgers and reading comic books and playing arcade games, why does he need to have other people with him to do it?  

But doesn’t it seem to be true that participation in certain activities seems to have developed a necessary social component at times?  Things like the movies, going out to eat, amusement parks and other similar activities are the sort of thing that people are expected do as a group or on a date or something like that.  It makes sense, of course, to want to share the joy of an enjoyable activity with others.  But what I have small-mindedly overlooked at times is that an enjoyable activity usually remains enjoyable even in the absence of other people.  Not only has this affected the way I formulate judgments about the people I encounter, but it has also affected my willingness to participate in certain activities depending on my own circumstances.  And that is not good. 

In the last few years of my life I’ve become a very social person.  And even earlier in my life, when I wasn’t quite so social, I still felt that certain activities were meant to be done with company.  So, in recent years, I have come to prefer the company of others over solitude.  Although I still find it pleasant to have some time alone now and then, I far prefer being around other people and doing activities with other people.  But here in San Diego, with my limited social access at the moment, I’ve decided that I need to start doing enjoyable activities even if it means doing them by myself.  Now to many of you this probably seems like a common sense conclusion and I probably seem silly, but it isn’t the first time I’ve been swayed by the social norms I perceive nor, likely, will it be the last.  And I feel like I’m probably not alone in my thoughts on this.

Lately, I’ve had the fortune of being short on immediately available friends, and my schedule hasn’t been very accommodating to the friends I have made, which has forced me to remember how to enjoy myself by myself.  And I no longer look with pity on those people who choose to enjoy a supposedly social activity on their own.  For all I know they are having the time of their lives and they don’t need anyone else to help them do that.

As my own experience goes the first movie I went to by myself was the Blair Witch Project, ’cause I HAD to see it.  Too bad it sucked.  And I hadn’t been to a movie by myself since, until a couple weeks ago.  I saw Get Smart.  Funny movie.  Was just as funny as it would have been had I been with friends.  I remember thinking that it would have been nice to have people to talk to about the movie afterwards and to go do something else after, but in all, I enjoyed myself.  And this last week I saw the movie Wanted alone.  Also, on a family trip to Branson, MO a few years ago, my family’s interests and mine diverged a little and I ended up going to a couple of shows by myself and to an amusement park by myself.  It wasn’t too bad either.  Again, I would have preferred to have someone else with me, but I still enjoyed myself.  I’ve never been out to a nice restaurant by myself.  That might be too weird for me.

So tell me, oh readers of mine, do you go to the movies by yourself?  Do you go to fancy restaurants by yourself?  Do you go to amusement parks by yourself?  Did it make you feel weird?  Tell me some of your favorite “social” activities to do alone.  Or tell me about when you saw somebody else doing such an activity alone.  I’m genuinely curious.  I have a hunch that older people are more likely to feel comfortable doing those kind of activities alone.  And naturally, introverts would also be more likely to go out alone.  But tell me your thoughts and stories.  Broaden my mind.

A Couple Of Recommendations

Sorry I haven’t updated this in so long.  I’ve been working way too much.  I’ve been thinking about some good topics for more interesting posts, so hopefully I’ll have something good to share soon.  But for today I wanted to make a couple of recommendations to all you consumers of popular media – one new and one old.  In the last few weeks I’ve been reading a bunch of books and I’ve seen a bunch of new movies and two in particular stuck out to me.

First, the book Ender’s Game by Orson Scott Card.  A lot of people have heard about this book, it’s kind of well-known, but somehow I didn’t manage to get around to reading it until a week ago.  And boy am I glad I did!  It’s a great book.  Well written, captivating and original story, and a unique perspective on human behavior and psychology.  I liked it so much I went and bought the sequel immediately and I’ll probably keep adding Ender books to my collection.  I don’t care what you think about science fiction, you should definitely read this book!

Second, the movie Wall-E.  I saw this film yesterday and I think it is my favorite animated film ever.  Before seeing the movie I read some reviews about the film that said that the lack of dialogue might turn away some viewers.  On the contrary, I feel the lack of dialogue enhanced the film that much more.  The characters still share a dialogue, just not in the traditional sense, but it is still just as meaningful, if not more.  The moments of actual verbal dialogue almost threatened to steal some of the beauty of the movie.  But ultimately, the film was made in such a way as to make it artful and moving and thoroughly enjoyable.  See it if you haven’t already!  Great movie.

Proud To Be A Canadian!

I would like to take this opportunity to wish everyone a belated Happy Canada Day!  I am so proud to be Canadian.  There’s so many things about Canada I love!  We’re peaceful, we have a good sense of humor, we are respectful of diversity, we have great music (I know Randy will agree), we have amazing scenery and natural beauty, we have a high quality of life, we have lots of polite people and there’s just something about a Canadian girl that I can’t get enough of, and there’s so much more!  Canada is awesome!

I missed Canada more than normal yesterday because of the occasion, but I vowed to celebrate my nation’s birthday even if it was by myself.  Luckily, some of my new American friends decided to help me celebrate.  So I grabbed my Canadian flag and had some fun.  We listened to a bit of Canadian music and just basked in Canadianness.  It wasn’t much, but I know Canada appreciated it.

 

Also on my nation’s birthday, I was proving to California that I do, in fact, know how to drive.  I took my road test and passed!  Yay!  I only made 4 errors out of a possible 15.  They were all for the same thing – not stopping behind the limit line at stop signs.  A stupid rule if you ask me.  It’s one of those rules that, after a decade or more of driving, you realize just doesn’t matter that much.  Am I right?  You know it.  So that said, I think it’s fair to say that I aced my road test!  Man, I’m awesome!

And that’s all for today.  Happy Canada Day (yesterday)!